Q: How long does it take to replace a centrally planned economy with a thriving free market?

A: One weekend plus a Monday.

Proof: On Friday, August 12 CCU faculty and staff were told that the era of free coffee was over. Our equivalent of the Central Committee Chairman told employees that they can drink all the coffee they want (and a certain academic VP is out to test the human limits of consumption), but they have to buy it at the coffee shop or cafeteria or bring in their own coffee and coffee makers.

On Monday, August 13, all university-supplied coffee, coffee makers and coffee supplies were summarily rounded up. But the anxiety and dull headaches of the caffeine-dependent were allayed by the appearance of individually owned and operated coffee makers, coffee supplies, and actual coffee in offices and lounges all over campus. One diminutive director of volunteer services was credited with securing Operations and Maintenance a Mr. Coffee machine for the princely sum of $5. O&M staff believed that this Wizard of the Yard Sale could get one for a quarter but still expressed joy at the outcome.

So the central coffee roundup was no tragedy. It was more like the fall of the Berlin Wall. The people were free. The entrepreneurial spirit was unleashed.

By Tuesday the smell of brewing Arabica permeated all corners of the campus. Employees browsed other offices searching for their favorite blend. "He comes here because he knows I make Starbucks," stated a certain director of a certain adult degree completion program about a certain employee of the business office.

Gone were the days of one-brew-fits-all, centrally controlled coffee supply, where mediocre blends were brewed and choked down to satisfy the caffeine jones, then allowed to simmer all day, reaching battery-acid quality. A thriving laissez faire coffee bazaar had opened. People made what they liked, as much as they wanted but no more, and enjoyed what they made.

And at the daytime headquarters of SWNID, we brewed some English breakfast tea. Tomorrow we'll have the leftovers iced for lunch.